First, I’d like to say that I had a thoroughly invigorating time watching all of us work on our feet! Thank you everyone for bringing so much to rehearsal tonight. And thank you, Matt, for the cupcakes mmm.
Over the past few days I’ve been going mad over this role. I felt as if I was floundering. What does he want? What is his journey? But today I felt like I discovered some fresh things about Feste, because of the music and discovering my relation to other characters. Feste wants to make sure that each of the other characters gets their genuine love. And because he has both witnessed and experience enough about relationships to know about them, he drops his bits of wisdom in the ears of his friends. He wants money. He needs money. He is ashamed that he needs coins ands prizes from others but also resentful that they have so much and give so little. I have noticed in the text that the times when Feste is most unsure of himself or awkward or embarrassed, the activity is begging. I was thinking that Feste has been away from this land for long time and he’s realized that he cannot make it ‘out there’ alone. So he roams back to his home to try and collect enough money to go sail away from Illyria for good. Start a new life. This makes the journey interesting. Because throughout the play, he realizes that he maybe that ‘plan’ is just a way to make him feel less embarrassed about needing money. Feste actually just wants them to be happy because he cares about their wellbeing. They are the characters of the story he tells.
Also, in each of the songs that I sing, there is a line or two that is profoundly meaningful in Feste’s life. More on this later!
“Goodbye my sweet-heart,
Goodbye my dear-o”
“My peace I would crave”
“Is it wrong to wish you still need me?”
Lastly, this image is what Feste falls asleep in every night (image at the top).
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